Being A Container - Holding Space For Others

We have all been called upon at one time or another to help a loved one through a difficult time. When the help required consists of concrete actions, such as running errands or making phone calls, we know what to do. But sometimes we are called simply to hold space for the person as they go through whatever they need to go through. They may need to express anger or grief; they may need to talk or be silent. They may need us to hold their hand; they may need us to give them time alone. Whatever the case, when we hold space for someone, we offer ourselves up as a container for the overwhelming feelings they may be encountering due to their circumstances.

When we offer ourselves in this way, the more centered and grounded we are, the better. Our steadiness allows our companion to lean into us for support, as our presence provides an environment in which they can be free to move. We can also help by being responsive, allowing them to dictate the flow of action from talking to not talking, from anger to grief, and back again. By being aware and open, we can help them confront their feelings when that feels right, and back off from them when they need a break. Holding space requires humility, conscientiousness, and the ability to step out of the way, to honestly understand that this is not about us.

When we love someone in this way, we provide a space in which they can simply be. Able to feel what they need to feel without worrying about how they are being perceived. We can provide this offering in person, over the phone, or even from a distance, through meditation. However we do it, when we hold space for someone in need, we are offering a gift of the highest nature.

Scattering Seeds of Kindness

As I woke up this morning at 5:55 am, I found myself praying for my children, I will always follow my prayer for my children with a prayer for my family and their families... how often, though, do we forget to pray for our friends and their families, thier trials and tribulations? We think of them as we go through our day, but how often do we put them in our prayers or thank God for their friendship and for bringing them in to our lives? They are a blessing indeed.

In all my years, I can count on one hand my true friends... I'm blessed. This week alone, I have seen a few friends of mine go through some trials, let downs, disappointments, grief even.

A woman at work that I greet every morning as we go to the dining room and get ready for our day, lost her mother yesterday. Her mother lives in Columbia, she was told that she was gravely ill and not improving. She was not in any situation to pull the money together ($1,200.00 in american money) to go and be by her side. The Gangrene had already taken her leg, up to her knee... they realized after the amputation that it had taken a life of its' own in the rest of her body. All I could do was offer my prayers to her and her family and if it was any comfort, I gave her my cross pendant. My prayers go out to her family and friends.

I have recently, I say recently, but... in 2005, I gained a Best Friend off of MySpace. She has truly been a blessing for me as I now have someone that I can turn to on my days of trials and tribulations for comfort and understanding, I can only hope that I can show "trustworthiness, loyalty, helpfulness, kindness, understanding, forgiveness, encouragement, humor, and cheerfulness ".

There are two other friends that have still stayed in touch and remain very dear friends since my days of being a school bus driver in 1998. Then I have another dear friend that we have been friends since Grade School. We don't talk every day, or once a week, but we know that the other is there when we really need eachother. We speak maybe once a month to every other month. So with that in mind... I leave you all with todays Daily Devotion.

Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.

Romans 12:10 NIV

What is a friend? the dictionary defines the word as "a person who is attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard." This definition is accurate, as far as it goes, but when we examine the deeper meaning of friendship, so many more descriptors come to mind: trustworthiness, loyalty, helpfulness, kindness,
understanding, forgiveness, encouragement, humor, and cheerfulness to mention
but a few.

How wonderful are the joys of friendship! Today, as you consider the many blessings that God has given you, remember to thank Him for the friends He has chosen to place along your path. May you be a blessing to them, and may they richly bless you today, tomorrow, and every day that you live.

A Thought to Jump Start Your Day

A person who really cares about his or her neighbor, a
person who genuinely loves others, is a person who bears witness to the truth.

Anne Graham Lotz